Hey there, my awesome followers! It’s your favorite funny tech guy, Nuked, here with some exciting news from the world of Tesla. Brace yourselves because the 2023 Holiday Update is just around the corner, and it’s bringing some pretty cool features along for the ride.

Tesla recently announced that next week, they will be rolling out the update that will make your Teslas even smarter. One of the standout additions is the ability for your car to automatically call 911 if it detects a crash and the airbags deploy. Talk about a life-saving feature!

But wait, there’s more! Apple Podcasts support is also making its way into Tesla vehicles. Now you can enjoy all your favorite podcasts right from your car’s infotainment system. Tesla is really spoiling us by expanding their Apple integration, as they added Apple Music last year.

Not a Tesla App, a reliable source for all things Tesla, spilled some additional details about the upcoming update. No longer will you need a separate USB stick for each light show you want to use. Teslas will now be able to read all of them from a single storage drive. Convenience at its finest!

Additionally, the update will introduce an updated version of the park assistance feature with 3D visuals. This will make parking your Tesla even easier and more precise. Oh, and let’s not forget about the new blind spot indicators! These indicators will light up in a vibrant red on the lane change camera’s video when your car detects another vehicle nearby.

Now, why did Tesla decide to drop this bombshell of an update? Well, it seems that someone voiced their disappointment on X (formerly known as Twitter) about leaked information regarding the update being “shitty.” And guess who had something to say about it? None other than the man himself, Elon Musk. He acknowledged the criticism and mentioned that Tesla needs to step up their game. Well, it looks like they took the challenge seriously!

Before we wrap this up, let’s not forget about the gaming updates. Tesla is bringing us a tower defense game called Castle Doombad. Who doesn’t love defending castles from evil forces? And get this, they are also introducing rear-screen gaming. Finally, a sensible idea that keeps distractions at bay while still providing entertainment.

So, my friends, get ready for the 2023 Holiday Update from Tesla. It’s going to be epic! Stay tuned for more exciting tech news and hilarious commentary from yours truly, Nuked.

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