Elon Musk’s counterclaims against Twitter are still under seal. Twitter went ahead and released a blow-by-blow response. The better with which to dunk on Elon along the way.

The counterclaims are a made-for-litigation tale that is contradicted by the evidence and common sense.

Twitter lawyers respond to Musk’s counterclaims, saying they’re interpersonally mean. Maybe that’s because they know how many people will read these documents.

We picked our favorite passages in the paperwork, and are showcasing them here for anyone who might be interested. We picked their favorite passages of the paperwork.

The statements were part of what Musk’s lawyers brought to bear during a hearing that established an October trial date date. Those statements have to do with spam and bot accounts.

Twitter briefly walks the court through its process, its paperwork, and its disclosure statements in previous SEC filings.’Musk does not identify any false or misleading statement of fact in this disclosure,’ Twitter notes.

Musk is n’t measuring the same thing as Twitter or even using the same data as Twitter. Musk is not using the data from Twitter.

Twitter goes on to suggest Musk is deliberately distorting numbers. Then it says,’who’s the bot now, hot stuff?’.

Musk relies on an Internet application called the’botometer’ which applies different standards than Twitter does. Earlier this year, he declared Musk as highly likely to be a bot.

Musk’s’fancy, secret, unexplained’ analysis of Twitter data was a website called botometer.

Twitter is willing to admit that the true part of the document is true. Here are some things that Twitter has willing to say are true.

Twitter admits that Musk is a Twitter user and has founded several companies. Twitter admitted that Musk has been a user. The company also admitted that murk is a user.

Twitter admits that its business is complex. Musk is a Twitter user and has over 100 million followers. Twitter admits the business is complicated.

Twitter admits that it detects and removes spam from its platform. Twitter admits it detects, removes spam and admits it removes it.

Later, Twitter admitted that’Musk tweets frequently’. It does so once in those words and once like this.

Twitter admits that Musk actively uses Twitter. Many people believe open discourse is essential to a functioning democracy. Twitter says that Musk uses Twitter.

Does Twitter believe open discourse is essential to a functioning democracy?. But they ca n’t form beliefs on whether, to Musk,’eliminating free speech is a cure worse than the disease’.

Twitter admitted that it did not provide the information in the April 28, 2022 press release to Musk parties before the parties had a non-disclosure agreement in place.

Twitter announced it miscounted its daily active users for several years. Musk complained that he did n’t get a heads up when he signed the NDA. But it seems pretty sensible to me not to tell anything to people with strong Twitter habits and poor impulse control until they’ve signed NDAs.

Because Musk thought due diligence was’costly and inefficent,’ so he did n’t do it.

Twitter avers that the Musk parties declined to undertake any due diligence prior to signing the merger agreement agreement. Twitter avers the decision.

Sometimes it just stings when your opponent agrees with you, according to CNN.com’s Kat kinsman. I mean, sometimes it stings when our opponent agrees to you.

Twitter admits that on July 8, 2022 defendants purported to terminate the merger agreement. The company filed litigation seeking specific performance of the merger deal, and that defendants have filed counterclaims.

Twitter admits this case exists. Twitter admits the case exists, so remember the will-he-or-won’t-he dance about Musk joining the board?.

Musk changed his mind about joining Twitter’s board. He later tweeted that he was’looking forward’ to taking the position.

Musk did n’t identify any false or misleading statements Twitter made. Twitter has gotten snitty about his withdrawal from the acquisition.

Twitter never made the disclosures that Musk now asserts are false. He now asserts the pretext for avoiding the merger agreement is false.

Twitter’s primary product, Twitter, is a global platform for real-time self-expression and conversation, including in the form of tweets. Twitter further avers that tweets have a maximum length of 280 characters.

I wonder what’social network’ and’microblogging’ mean to Twitter’s lawyers?. I wonder if we’re going to be able to see what’s happening to your lawyers?.

I’m just surprised not to see an actual emoji in the filing. I do n’t think this one needs more context, honestly, honestly.